Renew Vow Resources

My wife and I are renewing our wedding vows and wanted to know proper procedures as well as vows to tell one another.

The reaffirmation or service of blessing can be held in a church or synagogue but it is not a legal act. If you decide to hold it in a church or synagogue you will need a clergy member to sanction your vows. It may also include many elements of your first wedding and should include an emphasis on the two of you. You may repeat the same vows or as you wish we can write new vows for you.

You can send invitations, you may add a blessing of the original rings or purchase new reaffirmation rings. You can have music for your processional and recessional, share in a cup of wine and or distribute flowers to those in attendance. Planning is same as the different degrees of the wedding - Formal, Semi-formal etc. and all the trimming's can be included. Attendants aren't necessary but you can if you so choose.

Preparation:
If Religious Reaffirmation speak with your clergy member for guidelines.

You may want to find out about marriage encounter programs i.e... Worldwide Marriage Encounter, Inc. (presented in 12 faith expressions and several languages) 1-800-795-LOVE (5683).

United Marriage Encounter 1-800-334-8920

Jewish Marriage Encounter (of any faith call for referral group in your area) 1-516-538-7766

ENRICH- P.O. Box 190 Minneapolis, MN 55413

[Answer compliments of Dianna Emerson, Bonne Foi Bridals & Weddings]

Renewing Vows

What site would you suggest visiting concerning renewing vows, our first wedding was a "quickie", and we'd like to have a renewal of our vows to remember?

Some suggested sites: A church or synagogue, a home, a sentimental location (where you met, etc.), a scenic location, park or garden, a historic building or mansion, a vacation spot. As you can see, reaffirmation sites can be just about anywhere you like.

Anyone can officiate, since this is not a legal wedding (you've already done that). For renewal of vows as a religious commitment, a clergy person is the right officiant. A judge, family patriarch, college president, or someone in authority you respect could perform the ceremony. Your ceremony and reception can be as elaborate as you like. You can do the whole nine yards with wedding dress, bridesmaids, etc. The bride's headpiece should be simple and a wedding veil is not worn. Consider flowers, jeweled combs, etc. Some people use the same attendants as the first wedding. Or if there were none, start fresh. Consider including your children (if you have any) in the ceremony. Gifts should not be expected, although many guests will probably want to give you some memento. You can use the same rings you already have (and exchange them again). Or, new rings (an anniversary ring, gemstone ring (with birthstones), or a ring with a diamond or other precious stone for the number of years you've been together) can be used. A photographer and/or videographer should record all the happy moments. A guest book is also a good idea, cause your friends can write their good wishes. A fun idea is to ask guests to bring a photograph of them with one or both of you that you can keep. These can be posted on a board at the reception as you receive them and then you will also be able to put them in an album later. A second (or first) honeymoon can also be added to the planning.

Rehearsal Dinner

REHEARSAL DINNER

Who Attends

If space and/or finances are limited, only the members of the wedding party need to be invited. But, the guest list usually includes your attendants and the spouses of married attendants (or live-in partners), the immediate family on both sides (parents and siblings and their partners), parents of children in the wedding (young children are optional), and the officiant and his/her spouse (if they are well known to the host and hostess). If the musicians are personal friends they may also be invited. Most people also include out-of-town guests arriving for the wedding (or plan some other function for them to attend the night before the wedding). If you want to expand it, you can include grandparents and special aunts/uncles too.

Who Hosts and When

The groom's parents traditionally host the rehearsal dinner. But, most anyone can host it if the groom's parents do not. Invitations for the dinner can be sent after you have received RSVPs from out of town guests who you might want to include in the rehearsal dinner.The invitations can be word of mouth, by personal note, or by a printed invitation indicating the time and place of the dinner.

It is usually held the night before the wedding, directly following the rehearsal at the wedding site. If the wedding is going to be a morning or early afternoon affair, you could have the rehearsal and dinner a day or so before, so everyone is well-rested for the wedding day.

Where Held

It can be anywhere from a formal sit-down dinner in a nice restaurant to an informal buffet, or a backyard barbecue or lasagna party at someone's house.

Activities

The purpose of the rehearsal dinner is to have an opportunity to visit and relax with those closest to the bride and groom, so you can decide how many people that includes. This is also the occasion where most bridal couples give the gifts to their attendants. You could have slide shows or pictures of the bride and groom growing up placed on each table or displayed on an easel (which you could also display at the wedding reception site).