Sunday, July 31, 2016

Wedding Planning

I can't decide on anything for my wedding! Is their anyone or anything that can plan it for me!(Please, I have the worst tastes.) If you can't plan it for me then I'll take my business somewhere else!

EZWeddingPlanner is a program that lets you organize all the details of your wedding... the guest list, whose coming and not, how many, etc. and then you can seat them with the seating program. The Plan tells you the things you need to do with a countdown to your wedding date. And we send email reminders when they are coming due. You can track who you have hired and their contact people. The advice section gives you LOTS of tips and details on how to do most everything... contracts, wedding programs, invitation addressing, reception details, who does what and who pays, etc. The Budget section lets you track what you need to buy, who pays and what has already been paid and what's left, etc. You can set up a guest page to tell them where you are registered and what/where and when your events are held, etc. There are many other great wedding planning features in EZWeddingPlanner.com, and it's free!

But, you have to enter the data and make the final decisions on what you want. If you want someone to make those decisions for you, perhaps you should think of hiring a local wedding consultant. They can find vendors and interface with them and do all the details for you, as well as answering lots of general wedding taste questions.

Saturday, July 30, 2016

Simple Wedding

How can I plan a wedding that is plain and simple yet elegant in its own way? I don't want big and fancy but I want nice...

 In EZ Wedding Planner, look at the Plan for ideas of lots of things that need to be done and when they could be done by. You can modify your plan to fit your wedding. You can delete items you don't want and add others that may be unique to you. Also, there are LOTS of ideas in Plan/Great Ideas. Each wedding is somewhat different and it depends on location and budget and lots of variables. You can make it as elaborate or simple as you want, it's totally up to you. Marriage is a happy occasion and your friends and family will just be happy for you both. This doesn't depend a on large, grand wedding, it can be very basic and everyone will still be happy.

Friday, July 29, 2016

Photograph

PHOTOGRAPHY/VIDEOGRAPHY

Photography

You should choose a reputable, professional photographer specializing in wedding pictures. Begin your search for a photographer far in advance of the wedding date (up to a year or more) as many of the best photographers are booked up to a year or two ahead of time. Ask to see entire albums of recent weddings they have done. Find out what exactly is included in their "package price" – number of shots, time photographer will work, if album is included, website posting, proofs included, etc. Most photographers will take an engagement picture long before the wedding. This could be handy especially if you want to have an oil painting made from it. Many will include the engagement photo free if you book your wedding with them.

Meet with the person who will actually be taking the photos. Explain the formal and informal photographs that you want taken. Discuss any church restrictions, and ask your photographer to be as inconspicuous as possible. Also, appoint a friend or cousin to help the photographer round up special people, etc. so that your day isn't spent worrying about getting everyone together. Many couples today are having their posed church pictures taken before the service so as not to hold up the families/friends afterward.

Following is a helpful guide to be sure all those happy memories are captured on film. Create your own list in EZ Wedding Planner with the Photography List Free Form. You can copy/paste any of the below list into your personal list.

Before the Ceremony

  • Bride in dress.
  • Bride putting on veil.
  • Bride with mother.
  • Bride with father
  • Bride with both parents.
  • Bride with honor attendants.
  • Bride with bridesmaids.
  • Bride with grandparents/godparents/special friends.
  • Bride with brothers and sisters.
  • Bride touching up makeup/hair.
  • Everyone getting flowers.
  • Bride leaving house.
  • Bride and father getting into car.
  • Groom alone.
  • Groom with best man.
  • Groomsmen getting boutonnieres.
  • Other ____________

At the Ceremony

  • Guests outside the church.
  • Bride and father getting our of car.
  • Bride and father going into church.
  • Ushers escorting guests.
  • Groom's parents being seated (or in procession).
  • Bride's mother being seated (or in procession).
  • Soloist and/or organist.
  • Groom and groomsmen at altar (or in procession).
  • Giving-away ceremony.
  • Altar or canopy during ceremony.
  • Each attendant as procession begins.
  • Bride and father waiting for procession to begin.
  • Procession of groom with his parents/bride with her parents. During the Mass or service, the photographer should be most discreet and not distract from the central action taking place.
  • Bridal party at the altar.
  • Bride and groom exchanging vows.
  • Ring ceremony.
  • Groom meeting bride.
  • The kiss.
  • Bride and groom coming up aisle.
  • Bride and groom on church steps.
  • Bride alone in the church.
  • Bride and groom amongst the guests, wedding party.
  • Bride and groom getting into car.
  • Bride and groom in back seat of car.
  • Other ________________________
  • _____________________________

Posed Shots Before the Reception

  • Bridesmaids looking at bride's ring.
  • Bride's and groom's hands.
  • Bride and groom together.
  • Bride with parents.
  • Groom with parents.
  • Bride and groom with honor attendants.
  • Bride and groom with children.
  • Bride with her attendants.
  • Groom with his attendants.
  • Bride, groom, all the wedding party.
  • Bride, groom, all the parents.
  • Other

At the Reception

  • Bride and groom arriving.
  • Bride and groom getting out of car.
  • Bride and groom going into reception.
  • The receiving line (posed).
  • The receiving line (candid).
  • Bride and groom in receiving line.
  • Bride's mother in receiving line.
  • Buffet table.
  • Friends serving punch.
  • Bride and groom at bridal table.
  • Parents' table
  • Entire wedding party at table.
  • Bride and groom dancing.
  • Bride and her father dancing.
  • Groom and his mother dancing.
  • The musicians.
  • Bride and groom talking to guests.
  • Guest book table.
  • The cake table.
  • Bride and groom cutting the cake.
  • Bride and groom feeding each other cake.
  • Bride and groom toasting.
  • Throwing and catching the bouquet.
  • Groom taking off bride's garter.
  • Throwing and catching the garter.
  • Wedding party decorating car.
  • Bride changing into going-away clothes.
  • Groom changing into going-away clothes.
  • Bride and groom saying good-bye to parents.
  • Bride and groom ready to leave.
  • Guests throwing rice.
  • Guests waving good-bye.
  • Rear of car when leaving.
  • Other_________________

Shortly after the wedding date, your photographer will notify you that your proofs are developed. Many photographers use digital cameras and can have all of your photos displayed on your wedding day. You and your new husband can then select the shots you will want enlarged for your album. Keep in mind that your wedding photographs are an investment for your memory and for your new future. They also make nice gifts for friends and relatives who share in your joy and love!

Beware of the instant picture availability with digital cameras. We were at a wedding where the photographer had a laptop which he downloaded all the wedding pictures at the reception. The bride/groom and all the wedding party spent most of the reception looking at their pictures and didn't mingle with the guests. They even had to be coached to get on the dance floor because they were so consumed with looking at the laptop pictures. Your reception is a time for you to enjoy and mingle with the guests you invited. Let everyone have a good time and save the picture viewing for later.

Videotape Services

Videotaping, the newest fashion in wedding memories, promises to become as much of a tradition as still photographs. The equipment is lightweight and portable, allowing as much flexibility and scope as you want and are willing to finance. Tape players have fast forward and rewind features for pinpointing your favorite scenes any time you're feeling nostalgic. And lots of videographers put your wedding video on DVD with music and the bells and whistles.

How to Order

Select your wedding and reception sites before interviewing companies to be aware of restrictions on videotaping activities or lighting and power problems. Some religious denominations prohibit videotaping; others allow it but restrict auxiliary lighting to maintain a dignified atmosphere. Low lighting may not rule out taping but the quality will be grainier.

Videotaping wedding services require careful comparisons. Look for broad experience in commercial and industrial work and other wedding references to find the seasoned professionals. Keep a record on the worksheet of the information you gather.

Preview samples of the company's past work. Ask for a description of the proposed scenario and how many cameras are necessary to do it well. Productions range from a single camera shooting from one angle to several roving ones. The best tapes tell a story rather than show unrelated clips. Although you want to rely on the professional's experience, a good producer wants to know your expectations and preferences.

Encourage the video producer and still photographer to coordinate their plans beforehand for maximum, effective use of each medium.

Two types of productions are available. One, the least expensive, uses one camera in more stationary positions. Shots are taken as the action unfolds and there's no post-production work. That means no editing, no customizing and no music although you have the option of adding these later at additional costs. The church shots, for example, are taken with one stationary camera. If a bridal party member gets in the line of sight or you and the groom have to turn your back to the camera, that's what the completed tape will show.

More expensive productions use at least two roving cameras and remake the tape by editing. The cost increases with the complexity. An elaborate production may cost five or six times that of a simple, unedited tape.

Videotape Techniques

Directors have a variety of techniques at their command. Color tape and dual audio (microphones) are available. Your wedding music can be taped during the festivities and dubbed in later. Some tapes start with titles and a montage of two-to-three second clips, and it's possible to include interviews with friends and relatives.

What it Costs

Total cost will depend on equipment, how long the crew works, what graphics are added, and the tape length, sound dubbing, photographic special effects and editing which is often the biggest cost. Equipment ranges from "home movie" video cameras to high resolution, broadcast quality cameras. Generally, companies charge an hourly rate, though some set a flat fee. Decide what your wedding budget will allow and choose within those limits.

Why Video

Many churches are promoting the use of video today because it offers the most realistic memory of your wedding. You will be most nervous during the ceremony – perhaps so nervous that you might not remember the details afterwards. A video allows you to sit with family and friends later to view the wedding, sharing the many wonderful highlights together.

The reception, on the other hand, is full of fun and excitement. So many people to greet, so many things going on – even some family members you may not have seen in years. What a perfect way to remember the faces, the fun, the moments – like your wedding waltz, your favorite song, a special toast, a stolen kiss…My recommendation on videotaping the reception is to pay by the hour and save every inch of film, unedited. You will be happy you did.

Copies of the videotape make great gifts for friends far away. The video can also make an anniversary very special. The memory of your wedding can live on and on.

Thursday, July 28, 2016

Costs of Photographers

What is the average cost of a photographer for the bridal portrait and the wedding? Are you allowed to keep the proofs? Does the price quoted include the cost of the pictures or just their time for photographing the wedding?

We've seen photography packages as low as about $400 and as high as about $6,000 and everything in-between. It depends on what part of the country you are in and how many hours you want the photographer to be there (4 hours or 8 hours, etc.) An average package that would suit lots of brides would be somewhere around $1000-$2000. Some let you keep the proofs and some do not, it seems to be an individual photographers policy. Many will post your pictures on a website for viewing and ordering by your guests. Some include proofs for an additional fee and many will put them on a CD-ROM or DVD-ROM. Usually the prices quoted include lots of pictures in an album as well as their time (and often discounts on additional pictures ordered for family and friends for a certain time frame after the wedding). Many photographers also have videography packages available too, which will be an additional cost.

When you find a photographer you like, ask all these questions. The most important thing is that you like their style of photos and that you are comfortable with them.

You can go to Plan/Great Ideas for more detailed photography info.

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Paying for the Expenses

PAYING FOR THE EXPENSES

Who Pays For What

There aren't any absolute rules as to who pays for what. Traditionally, wedding expenses have been taken care of by the bride's family, with the groom responsible for the rings and the honeymoon.

While tradition is still an honored part of our heritage, financial obligations must often give way to everyday realities and compromise.

At the time of the wedding planning, both sets of parents, along with the engaged couple, should meet to discuss the financial arrangements. It is wise for each party to make any financial limits absolutely clear–to prevent misunderstandings or hard feelings at a later date after definite plans have been made.

If the parents of the groom are financially willing and able, they may offer at any time to pay part, half, or all of the wedding expenses. This is especially true if the groom's side has many more guests coming and/or if the bride's family and guests must incur travel expenses for a wedding held where the groom's family lives.

Costs should be allocated in order of priority of what is most important to the bride and groom. As a loose rule of thumb, reception food/drink is 50% of the total budget. Then photography 10%, flowers 10%, music 10%, dress, headpiece and veil 10%, misc (gifts, favors, fees, transportation, tips, etc.) 6%, and finally invitations 4%. These numbers can be adjusted based on your priorities.

Below is a traditional list of who pays for what, but the final decision really depends on who is most willing and able to pay.

The Bride

  1. Wedding ring for the groom (if it's a double ring ceremony).
  2. A wedding gift for the groom.
  3. Presents for the bridal attendants.
  4. Personal stationery.
  5. Accommodations for her out-of-town attendants.
  6. Physical examination and blood test.

The Groom

  1. The bride's rings.
  2. Wedding gift for the bride.
  3. The marriage license.
  4. Gifts for the best man and ushers.
  5. Flowers – bride's bouquet and going-away corsage; corsages for mothers; boutonnieres for men in wedding party.
  6. Accommodations for out-of-town users or best man.
  7. His blood test.
  8. Gloves, ties, or ascots for the men in the wedding party.
  9. Fee for the clergyperson/judge.
  10. The honeymoon.
  11. Bachelor dinner (optional).

The Bride's Family

  1. The entire cost of the reception: rental of hall, if reception is not held at home; caterer; food (including wedding cake); beverages; gratuities for bartenders, waiters; decorations; music; flowers.
  2. A wedding gift for the newlyweds.
  3. The bride's wedding attire/trousseau.
  4. The wedding invitations, announcements, thank yous, napkins, etc., and mailing costs.
  5. The fee for engagement and wedding photographs.
  6. Ceremony – rental of sanctuary; fees for organist, soloist, or choir, etc.; aisle carpets; and any other costs for decorations.
  7. Bridesmaids' bouquets.
  8. Gratuities for policeman directing traffic and/or parking.
  9. Transportation for bridal party from the bride's house to the wedding ceremony and from ceremony to the reception.
  10. Bridesmaids' luncheon.
  11. Rehearsal dinner (optional).
  12. Household furnishings for the bride and groom – from linens, china, silver, and crystal to furniture (optional).

The Groom's Family

  1. Clothes for the wedding.
  2. Any traveling expenses and hotel bills they incur.
  3. Wedding gift for the newlyweds.
  4. Rehearsal dinner, or any other expenses they elect to assume (optional).

The Attendants

  1. Their wedding clothes.
  2. Any traveling expenses they incur.
  3. Wedding gift for the newlyweds.

The Guests

  1. Any traveling expenses and hotel bills they incur.
  2. Wedding gift for the newlyweds.

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Over 50

Do you have some ideas for couples over 50? We need all the ideas we can get.

 Probably you will be paying for your own wedding, although if your parent's are still around, they could be listed as hosts if you like. Else you could word the invitations something like... The honour of your presence is requested at the wedding of Susan Lynn Smith to Matthew Andrew Larson... or Susan Lynn Smith and Matthew Andrew Larson wish you to share in their joy as they are united in marriage on... If you are having under 50 guests, you can hand write invitations on pretty paper or just telephone them. You may prefer a smaller ceremony and larger reception, in which case you could send out reception only cards. But if you would like a big wedding and reception, go for it, there is no reason not to.

Instead of a traditional shower, you may want to have a coed cocktail or dinner party that includes your fiancé, mutual friends, and their partners. And, if you already have everything you want for your household, maybe have guests bring something unique, like favorite recipes or pictures of themselves with you or your fiancé, or things for your garden or other hobby. If you want to register, consider things you may not have yet, like crystal or china or new sets of things that are worn out. Other things to register for could include your favorite wine, books, electronics, hobby preferences, etc. Some people also get the word out that they would like gift certificates to a specified travel agent (for honeymoon, etc.).

You can wear a long, formal dress in any color including white. Or any length gown in any color you prefer will also work fine. If this is a second marriage, skip the veil and go for flowers, a hat, pretty tiara, or nothing at all. If it's a first for you both, a veil is fine. The same holds for bridesmaids... anything from formal to street length dresses. The ceremony can be anywhere you are comfortable with, a church, a park, on the beach, city hall, etc. If this is a second wedding for either of you, hold the reception somewhere other than where the first one was held. If there are any children from previous marriages, consider including them in your wedding party.

Discuss finances and/or assets, as both of you may be well established already with a variety of household goods, real estate and investment holdings to merge or not merge, or dispose of. Take an inventory of what you have before registering for other gifts.

Take the time and spend the money to go somewhere special for your honeymoon. Go somewhere in the world that you both have always wanted to see, or somewhere that you have been before and really enjoyed.

Monday, July 25, 2016

Rental Equipment

We are wanting an outdoor reception. We are considering my fiance's parents home or a park. When do we need to think about reserving chairs and tables or contacting the companies for those things?

See outdoor receptions question. Timing for reservations differs by company. It's best to call around to rental companies and see what they have available for your date. Some may book a year in advance and some may only need a month or so notice. You will probably have to put down a deposit when booking to hold what you want for the date you want. They can also help suggest items you may not have thought of, that would add special touches to the decorations, etc.

Sunday, July 24, 2016

Outside Reception

Will we save money by having our reception outdoors or does that end up costing more?

You may save some money going outdoors, depending again on what you want. There are many rental companies who specialize in weddings and should have everything you need. We've been to some very lovely outdoor wedding/receptions. Outdoor considerations include: Back up tents or other cover are a good idea, in case of rain or blazing sun that will melt not only your cake, but also your guests. Tents should be set up several days prior to the event to ensure dry ground underneath. Have an adequate number of tables/chairs for both the wedding and reception. If the reception will go into the evening, you will want lights and perhaps heaters, depending on weather, which also necessitates electricity (and perhaps portable generators). If insects are a problem in your area, consider pre-spraying with insecticide or lighting punk sticks or citronella candles. If you want dancing, you may want to rent a portable dance floor. Also remember to consider the needs of any of your guests who may have special handicap or accessibility needs. Parking and rest room facilities should also be adequate for the number of guests you are planning. Then you have to consider the food/catering and preservation of food due to weather conditions. And probably hiring a bartender & purchasing liquor. Parks may require special permits for large events (and may restrict alcohol use) and/or security personnel. If you have it in a park (or actually anywhere outside), also plan for cleanup duty by someone after the affair. Check on the trash disposal requirements of the park. Some people have had pot luck beach parties or backyard barbecues for receptions, which can save lots of money. It just depends on your choices. EZWeddingPlanner advice section has more reception site details and suggestions.

Saturday, July 23, 2016

Outside Wedding

We're planning an outside wedding. Any suggestions?

There are many locations that specifically cater to outdoor weddings and will be able to coordinate all the details. If you are planning it yourself, here's some things to think about. Back up tents or other cover are a good idea, in case of rain or blazing sun that will melt not only your cake, but also your guests. Tents should be set up several days prior to the event to ensure dry ground underneath. Have an adequate number of chairs for both the wedding and reception. If the reception will go into the evening, you will want lights and perhaps heaters, depending on weather. If insects are a problem in your area, consider pre-spraying with insecticide or lighting punk sticks or citronella candles. If you want dancing, you may want to rent a portable dance floor. Also remember to consider the needs of any of your guests who may have special handicap or accessibility needs. Parking and rest room facilities should also be adequate for the number of guests you are planning.

Friday, July 22, 2016

Origins and Customs

ORIGINS AND CUSTOMS

Origin of the Engagement and Wedding Rings

The ring as a symbol of marriage may have evolved from an African custom where the bride and groom's wrists were tied together with grass during the ceremony. And when grooms negotiated purchase of their brides, they often gave metal rings as partial payment. Eventually, the more precious the metal the wealthier the groom. In ancient Egypt before coins were minted, gold rings were used as currency. To show he trusted his wife with his money, the Egyptian husband placed one of these rings on her finger. The ancients thought that love traveled to the heart in the vein of the third finger of the left hand. To this day, that is still the finger on which the wedding ring is worn. To them, the circle indicated eternity and the iron symbolized lastingness. In any case, the bride received just one ring–upon her engagement. Then, in 1215 the Pope declared a longer waiting period between betrothal and the marriage. So, a second ring, the wedding ring, was placed on the bride's finger during the ceremony when she finally wed.

Another interesting legend is the ring ceremony. During the ceremony the ring was placed on the open Bible. The clergyman then sprinkled it with holy water and blessed it. Then the groom picked it up with his right hand and placed it on the bride's thumb, saying, "In the name of the Father." He then transferred it to the first finger, saying, "And of the Son." Next he changed it to the second finger as he said, "And of the Holy Ghost." Finally he placed it on her finger with "Amen." It did not seem to matter whether the ring was placed on the bride's right or left hand. Sometimes it was placed on the right hand at the espousal and on the left at the wedding ceremony.

Origin of the White Bridal Gown

In early Saxon days and through the 18th century, it was the poorer bride who came to her wedding dressed in a plain white robe. This was in the nature of a public statement that she brought nothing with her to her marriage and that therefore her husband was not responsible for her debts. Other brides simply wore their Sunday best. Red was a favorite during the Middle Ages in Europe. Icelandic brides chose black velvet. Colors were chosen for their symbolism as well as for preference. Blue meant constancy; green meant youth. Yellow signified jealousy and therefore was never worn. The brides of ancient Israel wore a blue ribbon on the shoulders of their robes to symbolize purity, fidelity and love. Over the years, the meaning of a white dress symbolized purity. Today, white merely symbolizes the wedding itself–and can be worn by anyone, including the second-time and re-affirming bride.

Origin of the Bridal Veil

In Far Eastern countries, people believed that wicked spirits were especially attracted to women. So, as protection from the Evil Eye, women always wore veils. The custom continued although the feeling behind it changed with time into a role of modesty and obedience. From this the veil developed into a symbol of chastity. Then it became the sign of submission of women.

The introduction of the veil into Europe came through returning Crusaders. In early wedding traditions in Europe, the bride was bargained for through her father, was swathed in a bridal veil, and revealed to her mate after the ceremony!

In early centuries, Hebrew, Greek and Roman brides wore veils of many colors, and veils threaded with gold and silver. In Southern Europe, early Christians placed a large cloth over both the bride and groom. In Anglo-Saxon times, the bride wore her hair hanging loose as part of the wedding ritual. The Chinese held a sacred umbrella over the bride's head. Around 1500 in Europe, there was a fashionable conical headdress topped with a veil that hung to the toes. Each era has revealed a different style for the bridal veil.

Nellie Custis was the first American woman to wear a long, white veil of lace when she married Lawrence Lewis, an aide to President Washington. Nellie chose lace because the Major had once glimpsed her face through the lace curtains of an open window–and then afterwards he couldn't stop telling her how beautiful she had looked!

The veil has traditionally stood for youth and virginity.

Origin of Throwing Rice, Old Shoes, Etc.

In the days when people lived off the land, their existence depended upon having a good harvest and enough children to help with all the work. Primitive people believed the bride and groom spread good luck on their wedding day. Anyone or anything that touched them would also be lucky. So they showered the couple with ripe grain or nuts, wishing a large harvest for themselves and a large family for the newlyweds. The throwing of grain seemed to symbolize good luck, fertility or abundance. To this day, wedding guests throw rice, grain, confetti, birdseed, etc.

Among the ancient Assyrians and Jews, when a bargain was made, a man gave his sandal as an indication of good faith. A shoe was the symbol of authority. When the Anglo-Saxons hurled a shoe, it indicated that authority had been transferred. Some authorities believe that the throwing of a shoe can be traced back to the missiles which the bride's father hurled at the robber caveman.

Origin of Flowers for the Wedding Party

Throughout history, most celebrations of weddings used flowers in some way. Almost every country has its own traditions and symbolism concerning flowers.

Customs associate the orange blossom most closely with the wedding ceremony. The wearing of a wreath of orange blossoms as a crown over the bridal veil was a Saracen custom introduced by returning Crusaders. Orange blossoms were so expensive that only the wealthy could afford them and poorer brides resorted to artificial ones. A "kissing knot" of croton leaves and rosemary was hung over the bridal couple in Elizabethan England. In Sweden it was believed necessary to put chives, garlic or rosemary in the bride's bouquet to keep the dwarfs from bothering her on her wedding day. In Poland it was believed that to sprinkle the bride's bouquet with sugar would keep her temper sweet. In Rome, roses and marigolds were used to decorate the bride's home. Below are some "meanings" associated with certain flowers:

Apple blossoms or quince blossoms–better things to come
Clematis–love vine
Ivy–gold luck
Rosebud–a promise
Myrtle–lover's flower
Laurel–peace
Tulips–infidelity
Yellow flowers of any kind–jealousy
Orange blossoms–fertility
Heather and sweet basil–fortune
Baby's breath–fertility
Cabbage roses–richness of spirit
Anemones–hope
Lily of the Valley–happiness
Red an white roses–unity in love
Lilacs–youthful love
Pansies, forget-me-nots, white clover–special friendship

Origin of the Wedding Cake

The wedding cake has always been an important part of any wedding feast. Where or when it first originated cannot really be told since it is such an ancient custom. Among certain American Indian tribes, and among the Fiji Islanders, a bride offered her husband a cake of meal. The Romans broke a cake made of salted meal over the bride's head as a symbol of abundance, or fertility. Many people of various nations customarily dropped wheat, flour or cake upon the bride's head, then ate these offerings for good luck. The early Britons baked large baskets of small dry crackers for weddings, and every guest took one home–thus, the tradition of taking wedding cake home to "dream on." During the Middle Ages, it was traditional for the bride and groom to kiss over a pile of small cakes. The small cakes gradually increased in size and richness. Then an enterprising young baker decided to mass all these cakes together and cover them with frosting, thus the modern tiered wedding cake was born.

Cultural Customs

Every culture has its own charming wedding customs. Use your imagination and adapt one from the land of your ancestors. We've researched a few and a librarian will help you probe further.

Africa
"Mayst thou bear 12 children with him" is still the common salutation to brides in remote areas. Many tribes marry the couple by binding their wrists with plaited grass.

American Indian
The groom wraps a woolen blanket around the bride to symbolize love and protection.

Afro-American
On antebellum plantations, brides believed Tuesday and Wednesday weddings guaranteed them a good husband, long lives and happy days.

Bermuda
Newlyweds plant a small tree in their garden. As it grows and strengthens, it symbolizes their love.

Belgium
Brides carry a handkerchief embroidered with their name. After the ceremony, it's framed and displayed until the next family bride adds her name.

China
Two goblets of honey and wine are joined with a red ribbon–the centuries-old color of love and joy–and the couple exchange a drink of unity.

Czechoslovakia
Brides wear wreaths of rosemary for wisdom, love and loyalty.

England
A country bride and her wedding party walk to church on a carpet of blossoms to assure a happy path through life.

Finland
A bride once wore a golden crown during the ceremony. Later she was blindfolded while unmarried women danced around her. Whomever she crowned was predicted to be the next bride.

France
The bride and groom drink a reception toast from an engraved silver two-handled cup, called a "coupe de marriage," and pass it on to future generations.

Germany
On the eve of the wedding, friends of the bride smash pottery at her door. The loud noise is said to avert bad luck. To be sure of future bliss, the bride must sweep it up by herself.

Greece
Couples hold candles decorated with ribbons and flowers.

Holland
A bride and groom sit on thrones under an evergreen canopy–for everlasting love–during a pre-wedding party given by the family. One by one guests approach and offer good wishes.

India
The groom's brother sprinkles flower petals on the couple at conclusion of ceremony. Each family has prepared puffed rice, which is mixed during the ceremony for prosperity and fertility.

Iran
In Persian times, the groom bought ten yards of white sheeting to wrap around the bride as a wedding dress.

Ireland
December 31 is considered the luckiest day for weddings in the Ould Sod.

Italy
Since Roman times, couples have walked through the village passing out cakes and sweets.

Japan
The bride and groom take nine sips of sake, becoming husband and wife after the first sip.

Israel
For centuries, couples have had a marriage contract in the form of written vows, called a ketubbah, which is embellished by an artisan with bible verses and decorative borders symbolizing the home.

Lithuania
Parents of the couple serve them symbols of married life: wine for joy, salt for tears and bread for work.

Mexico
A white silk cord is draped around the couple's shoulders to indicate their union. Later, guests hold hands in a heart-shaped circle while the newlyweds dance in the center.

Philippines
A white silk cord custom is practiced here as well as in Mexico. All wedding expenses are met by the groom's family, who give the bride old coins symbolizing prosperity. The bride's family presents the newlyweds with a cash dowry.

Poland
Brides wear embroidered white aprons over their gowns. Guests discreetly tuck money into the pockets of the aprons.

Rumania
Wedding guests, other than family, receive gifts rather than give them.

Spain
Brides wear mantillas and orange blossoms in their hair. Grooms wear a tucked shirt hand-embroidered by the bride.

Sweden
Brides carry fragrant herb bouquets to frighten away trolls and grooms have thyme sewn into their wedding suits.

Switzerland
Junior bridesmaids lead the procession tossing colored handkerchiefs to the guests. Whoever catches one contributes money for the couple's nest egg.

U.S.A.
Early Americans gave the honeymooners posset, a hot drink of sweetened and spiced milk curdled with ale or wine, to keep up their energy.

Wales
Brides give attendants cuttings of aromatic myrtle. When one blooms, it foretells another wedding.

Traditions

Trinkets of gold and silver (sometimes quite valuable) are wrapped in waxed paper or foil and often baked in one tier of the bride's cake, or inserted from the bottom after baking. These are intended only for the bridal party–the bridesmaid's gifts are on the left, and groomsmen's are on the right.

Usually the bottom tier of the cake is used, and when the trinkets are placed inside, a marking such as an extra blossom bud, or a piece of white satin ribbon is used to indicate where the surprises are. Traditionally, the following "fortunes" are signified by each trinket:

For the bridesmaids: Wishbone–luck
Heart–romance
Cat–old maid
Ring–next to marry
Dime–fortune
Thimble or miniature scissors–industry

For the groomsmen: A button or dog–bachelor
A man's wedding ring–next to marry
Gold coin–money
Dice–luck

Origin of Tossing the Bouquet or Garter

Originally, it was not a bouquet, but a garter that was tossed. This custom of tossing the garter originated in 14th Century France. For a time a stocking was tossed, but its removal was not easy or graceful. Finally some bride thought of tossing her bouquet and this custom has been followed ever since. Of course, to this day, the gal that catches the bouquet is predicted to be the next to marry, and the guy that catches the garter will be the next guy to get married!

Origin of the Honeymoon

The first marriages were by capture, not choice. When early man felt it was time to take a bride, he carried off an unwilling woman to a secret place where her parents or relatives wouldn't find them. While the moon went through all its phases–about 30 days–they hid from the searchers and drank a brew made from mead and honey. Therefore, we get the word honeymoon. Today, this has come to be a time for the couple to get away to relax and enjoy each other after the hectic schedule of preparing for the wedding.

Thursday, July 21, 2016

Officiant

Who is the officiant and what is his/her role?

The officiant is the person who performs the wedding ceremony. It's the minister, priest, rabbi, judge, etc. The person who legally pronounces you man and wife. Other duties may include: counseling the couple prior to the wedding day, preparing the wedding ceremony wording, attending and presiding over the rehearsal, and then performing the ceremony on the wedding day. They are typically invited to the reception. They are also typically paid for their services.

Wednesday, July 20, 2016

Newspaper Announcements

NEWSPAPER ANNOUNCEMENTS

Writing Your Announcements for the Newspaper

An otherwise memorable occasion may be marred if the newspaper account of your engagement/wedding is incorrect. This could involve something as minor as misspelling the name of one of your bridesmaids, or it could be a major as your having married the wrong groom. Because many errors can be traced to confusing information, omissions, or illegible handwriting, it's very important that the person submitting the story or wedding form be very clear on all the details. Typed information is the surest method of submitting the information. Many allow email submissions. To avoid confusion and disappointment, here are some tips on how to help the newspaper publish the right information.

Engagement announcements may be submitted by the bride's parents, by the bride and groom, or by the groom's family, especially when published in their hometown newspaper.

Announcements should be sent to your hometown newspaper and your fiancé's (if he lives elsewhere). If you have many relatives living in another community, include that paper and do the same for your fiancé. Obtain copies of the newspapers you plan to insert your announcement in to help you tailor your story to their style. Also obtain information as to what each newspaper requires from the lifestyle editor.

Engagement Form Rules

  1. Each couple may choose to have either an engagement or wedding photo published. If the choice is an engagement photo, it may be submitted within the six months preceding the wedding.
  2. Write your name on the back of the photo and clip it to the form. Photos are seldom returned, so don't submit the only copy of your favorite. And, you may be able to pick up the photo after publication.
  3. Engagement announcements submitted without a photo may be printed at any time up to one month prior to the wedding.
  4. Fill out the form using complete legal names (no nicknames).
  5. The announcement should contain the full names of the bride and groom, the names of each set of parents, the city and state in which the wedding will be held (if it will take place in a different location from which the announcement is being published), and the date (or at least the month) when it will occur. You might want to also add information about your education and careers.

Wedding Form Rules

  1. Each couple may choose to have either an engagement or wedding photo published. Photo must be of the couple.
  2. Quality black and white photos of the couple are preferred. It is suggested a close-up portrait of the couple (head and shoulder picture) be submitted.
  3. Fill out the form using complete legal names (no nicknames).
  4. Write name on back of photo and clip to this form.
  5. Return this form to the newspaper.
  6. Wedding photographs may be picked up at the newspaper after publication.

Following these tips and preparing your wedding write-up with care may not guarantee against mistakes, but it should help the newspaper get your wedding story right and leave you with an announcement worth framing, or to put in a nice family scrapbook for all to enjoy!

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Non Smoking

Is it appropriate to put "non smoking occasion" on the invitations?

While you could print it if you want, those who smoke will find a place/way to do it anyway. It is an addiction and they need a fix. It's unrealistic to expect some smokers to go all day/night without a cigarette, much as you would like it. Printing it on the invitation may offend some guests and stop some smoking guests from attending, which you probably wouldn't want to do.

It somewhat depends also on where the wedding/reception is. Most people will not smoke in a church (and if there are signs posted no smoking, they will simply go outside). Many hotels/restaurants are no-smoking in public areas and many have separate smoking rooms or areas designated for smokers. You can post no smoking signs at your reception site if there are none already. Or, smokers will again simply go outside to smoke. If you have this at your parents house or some other relatives' house, you can certainly tell guests and post signs that say NO smoking in the house.

Monday, July 18, 2016

Church Membership

Neither of us are members at a church, but would like a church wedding...what do you suggest?

Each church/denomination is different, so it's best to talk directly to the officiant (pastor, priest, rabbi, etc.) of a church you are considering. Many churches/clergy will marry non-members, although the costs will usually be more than for members. Most clergy also require talking to the engaged couple about their religion prior to performing the ceremony. Some people have used church facilities associated with a University campus, which typically perform weddings for people not affiliated with a specific church. They are often very beautiful locations, as often times are churches/chapels associated with the military or V.A. locations.

Sunday, July 17, 2016

What Do I Do

Help!!!! I don't know the first thing about planning a wedding, and I'm new at this computer thing so I'm not real good at it, I need to know what to do! Everything to do!!!

Plan has all the details you have to think about.

But if you like to read, why not buy books (or go to the library) - many have all the wedding details. There are also many Amazon Kindle books about weddings, including this excellent one:

Saturday, July 16, 2016

Nephews in Wedding

When we were picking out the wedding party, I failed to think that my nephews would be in it. I thought my niece could be a jr bridesmaid and my fiancé's cousin would be the jr groomsmen. We already have the flower girl and ring bearer picked. My mother thought my nephews were going to be in it. Oopss! Forgot to tell her. Well, she told my sister that the boys are going to be in it. Okay, that is fine, they will look and be adorable. One problem, what part will they have? Any suggestions?

Depending on how old your nephews are, they could be ushers or Jr. ushers, candle lighters (light candles just before the mother of the bride is seated and extinguish them at the end of the ceremony - usually between ages 9-14), do a reading of some sort (scripture or poem, etc.), hand out wedding programs to the guests, play an instrument or sing, or be train bearers (carry a lengthy train down the aisle behind the bride - traditionally two boys about equal height are chosen for this - they can be as young as 4 to do this). They could be dressed the same as the Jr. groomsmen.

Friday, July 15, 2016

Edit Brid

How do I edit the bride or groom name in EZWeddingPlanner?

 Go to People and click on the name (which would be either the bride's or groom's name). You can edit these names, but do not delete either of these two. Any other guest names may be safely modified or deleted at any time. If you change the bride or groom name, it may take up to a day for this update to show unless you log out and then log back into the program.

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Ceremony Music - Vocal Music for Non-Liturgical Wedding

Ceremony Music - Vocal Music for Non-Liturgical Wedding

Amazing Grace

Collins

Hal Leonard

And I Love You So

McLean

Columbia

Annie's Song

Denver

Cherry Lane

Beautiful

Lightfoot

Warner Bros.

Benedictus

Simon & Garfunkle

 

Bridge Over Troubled Waters

Simon & Garfunkle

Hal Leonard

Candle On The Water

Kasha Hirschhorn

Cherry Lane

Can't Help Falling In Love

Peretti/Creatire/Weiss

Hal Leonard

Colour My World

Pankow

Columbia

Could I Have This Dance

 

Hal Leonard

Devoted To You

Bryant

Columbia

Endless Love

 

Hal Leonard

Evergreen

Streisand/Williams

Warner Bros.

Farewell Andromeda

Denver

Cherry Lane

First Time I Ever Saw Your Face

McColl

Columbia

Follow Me

Denver

Cherry Lane

For All We Know

Wilson/James/Karlin

Columbia

For Baby (For Bobby)

Denver

Cherry Lane

Forever Young

Dylan

Warner Bros.

The Hands Of Time (Brian's Song)

Legrand

Warner Bros.

Hawaiian Wedding Song

 

Hal Leonard

Hopelessly Devoted To You

Farrar

Hal Leonard

I Can't Help Falling In Love

 

Columbia

I Don't Know How To Love Him

Rice/Webber

Hal Leonard

I Honestly Love You

Allen/Barry

Columbia

I Just Want To Be Your Everything

Gibb

Hal Leonard

I Only Want To Be With You

 

Hal Leonard

I Won't Last A Day Without You

Williams

Columbia

If

Gates

Warner Bros.

If Ever I Would Leave You

 

Hal Leonard

If I Were A Carpenter

P. P. Mary

Columbia

If We Only Have Love

Brel

Hal Leonard

I'll Never Be Alone

McJuen

 

I'll Never Find Another You (The Promised Land)

The Seekers

 

In My Life

Lennon/McCartney

Cherry Lane

Just The Way You Are

Joel

Columbia

Let It Be

Lennon/McCartney

Cherry Lane

Let It Be Me

Becaud

Hal Leonard

Let's Get Together

Powers

 

Longer

Fogelberg

Columbia

Look To The Rainbow

Lane

Hal Leonard

Lord Of The Dance

Carter

 

Love

Lennon

Cherry Lane

Love Is A Many Splendored Thing

Webster/Fain

Columbia

Love Me Tender

Presley/Matson

Hal Leonard

Love Song

Murray

Warner Bros.

Love Song, A

Loggins

 

Love Story

Lai

Columbia

More

Ortolani/Oliviero

Hal Leonard

Morning Has Broken

Stevens

Warner Bros.

My Cup Runneth Over

Jones

Hal Leonard

My Sweet Lady

Denver

Cherry Lane

My Treasure

Brown

Sparrow Birdwing

Nadia's Theme

DeVorzon & Botkin

Warner Bros.

Our Love

Carpenters

 

People

Streisand

Hal Leonard

People Alone (The Competition)

 

Columbia

Perhaps Love

Denver

Cherry Lane

Poems, Prayers, and Promises

Denver

Cherry Lane

The Rose

McBroom

Warner Bros.

So Many Ways

King

 

Sometimes

Mancini

Columbia

Song Is Love, The

P. P. Mary

Warner Bros.

Sound Of Music

Rogers and Hammerstein

Hal Leonard

Speak, Softly Love

Rota

 

Starting Here, Starting Now

Maltby

Hal Leonard

Sunrise, Sunset

Harnick & Bock

Hal Leonard

Sunshine On My Shoulder

Denver

Cherry Lane

That's The Way

Terry

Sparrow Birdwing

This Is the Day

Brown

 

Through The Eyes Of Love

Sager/Hamlisch

Columbia

Till There Was You

Wilson

Hal Leonard

Time For Us, A

Rota/Kusik/Snyder

Columbia

Time In A Bottle

Croce

Warner Bros.

To Love

Cason/Gibb

 

Today

Sparks

Columbia

Together Forever

Jones

 

Top Of The World

Carpenters

Columbia

True Love

Porter

Hal Leonard

Truly

Richie

Cherry Lane

Try To Remember

 

Hal Leonard

Turn, Turn, Turn

Byrds

Hal Leonard

Twelfth Of Never

Mathis

Hal Leonard

Up Where We Belong

 

Columbia

Wedding Song

Collins

 

Wedding Song (There Is Love)

Stookey

Warner Bros.

You've Only Just Begun

Williams/Nichols

Columbia

What A Difference You've Made In My Life

Jordan

Hal Leonard

What Are You Doing The Rest O Your Life

Lagrand

 

Whenever I Call You Friend

Loggins

Warner Bros.

With You I'm Born Again

Conners/Shire

Columbia

Wonder Of You, The

Knight

Hal Leonard

Would You Walk With Me?

Colter

 

You And I

Wonder

Columbia

You Are The Sunshine Of My Life

Wonder

Columbia

You Light Up My Life

Brooks

Columbia

You Needed Me

Goodrum, Murray

Hal Leonard

CEREMONY MUSIC - CURRENT VOCAL MUSIC FOR NON-LITURGICAL WEDDINGS

After All (from Chances Are)

Cher & Cetera

Belwin

All I Ask Of you (Phantom of the Opera)

Andrew Lloyd Webber

Hal Leonard

Because I Love You

Brooks/Stevie B.

Hal Leonard

(Everything I Do) I Do It For You

Adams/Lange/Kamen

Warner/Belwin

From A Distance

J. Gould/B. Mitler

Belwin

Forever In Love (instrumental)

Kenny G.

Hal Leonard

Here and Now

Luther Vandross-Steel & Elliot

Hal Leonard

Have I Told You Lately

Van Morrison/Rod Stewart

Hal Leonard

I Cross My Heart

George Strait/Doff Haz

Warner/Belwin

Love Of A Lifetime

Levety Anare/Firehouse

Hal Leonard

Somewhere Out There (American Tale)

Horne/Mann/Weil

Hal Leonard

The Greatest Love Of All

Creed/Masser/Whitney Houston

Belwin

The Wind Beneath My Wings (From Beaches)

Henley/Siban

Warner

Unchained Melody

Aarek/North/Righteous Brothers

Hal Leonard

Vows Go Unbroken

Burr/Kaz/Kenny Rogers

Hal Leonard

When I Fall In Love

Celine Dion & Clive Griffin

Hal Leonard

Whole New World (Aladdin)

Alan Menkon & Tim Rice

Hal Leonard

You're The Inspiration

Cetera/Foster/Chicago

Belwin

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

Reception Music

RECEPTION MUSIC

The music at your reception will set the tone for the festivities. Once you have decided on the kind of reception you want, you will then need to determine the kind of music you want. Your choice of entertainment should be made far in advance, as the best bands are usually booked early. There are probably local booking agents who represent and have demo tapes for many bands. You can specify your budget and they can provide you with many choices. Be aware that they also charge a percentage of the total as their fee, so negotiate up-front. For very formal, traditional weddings a big band or orchestra will give you a better ambience than a DJ.

In selecting a band:

  • Discuss with the leader the type of music you want played, as well as the kind of music you do not want.
  • Discuss what specific selections you want played and when.
  • Find out how many musicians there are, what they will wear, whether or not they play continuously or take short breaks. Specify the exact number of musicians you are hiring and what instruments they play.
  • If there are certain musicians whom you want to appear personally (vocalist or specific instrument) specify them by name in your contract.
  • Ask how the rate is computed – hourly or on a set fee basis.
  • Specify in the contract the date and location of the reception and at what times the band should arrive and leave.
  • Ask for referrals or ask to listen to them perform. Take time to go hear them at some of their next engagements.
  • Some bands also use professional staging and lighting effects. Be sure your reception site has adequate room for their equipment and enough electrical outlets.
  • Ask if you are required to provide the musicians with food.
  • You will probably need to pay a deposit, maybe up to 50%. Reserve some of the total payment till they are finished playing. This way, if you have disagreements, you can negotiate a final fee.
  • Get everything agreed upon in writing, including the names of the musicians and hours they will be performing. Also include any overtime rates.

You may also want to consider contacting a disc jockey, who can usually provide a wide variety of musical selections and may act as your master of ceremonies. A DJ will be less expensive than a live band and will require less space for equipment. Another benefit is that your guests will hear the original songs played as they remember them. And with a DJ, you will have continuous music, whereas live musicians generally require breaks.The volume is also more easily adjusted by a DJ than with a live band.
In selecting a DJ:

  • Ask for other wedding references and call them.
  • Discuss what music you want and don't want.
  • See if you can provide your own favorites if the DJ doesn't have them.
  • Specify in the contract the date and location of the reception and at what times the DJ should arrive and leave.
  • Find out how many hours are included in the fee and what are overtime rates.
  • Ask how many breaks he/she will take and for how long.
  • Ask if you are required to provide the DJ with a meal.
  • Check on what equipment he/she will bring and double check the room facilities.
  • Ask if he/she has backup equipment and/or a backup DJ in case of illness.
  • The DJ's attire should match the formality of your wedding.
  • Get everything agreed upon in writing.

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Ceremony Music - Processionals and Recessionals

CEREMONY MUSIC - PROCESSIONALS AND RECESSIONALS

A Wedding Processional Near Gray
Aginecourt Hymm Dunstable Presser in Treasury Of Organ Music ed. Biggs
Bridal Chorus (from Lohengrin) Wagner G. Schirmer, Belwin, and other wedding books
Cortege Young Young, 11 Organ Pieces, Flammer
Epithalame (Sortie) Willan Berandol, BMI Canada
Epithalame (Rise Up, My Love) Willan Oxford
Fanfare and Processional Wagner Flammer
Festival Flourish Jacob Oxford, Album of Praise
Hornpipe (from "Suite From Water Music") Handel J. Fischer, Novello-Wedding Album
Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring Bach Concordia, Oxford, etc.
Joyful, Joyful We Adore Thee Beethoven Hope, Everything For The Wedding Organist
Largo (from Xerxes) Handel Lorenz, Handel Made Practical For The Church Organist
My Spirit Be Joyful Bach Presser, Belwin
National hymn Warren Hymnals
Now Thank We All Our God Bach Belwin, others
Now Thank We All Our God Johnson Augsburg
Organ Processional for Manuals Bender Concordia
Praise My Soul, The King Of Heaven Goss Hymnals
Praise To The Lord Manz Concordia, Choral Improvisations Set II
Prelude in Classic Style Young Lorenz
Processional of Joy (Beethoven's Ninth Symphony) Beethoven C. Fischer
Procession On "Westminster Abbey" Wetzler Concordia
Rigaudon Campra Belwin
Saint Anthony Chorale Hayden Hymnals
Thanks Be To Thee (Arioso) Handel Hymnals
Triumphal March Grieg Peters
Toccata From the 5th Symphony Widor G. Schirmer, Kalmus
Trumpet Fanfare (Rondeau) (Theme from television series Masterpiece Theatre) Clerambault Mercury, Treasury Of Early Organ Music ed. Biggs
Variations on A Theme From Hayden Brahms G. Schirmer
Wedding Processional And Air Leupold Augsburg